


97 liners

by seouq (orphan_account)



Category: GOT7, NCT (Band), SEVENTEEN (Band), 방탄소년단 | Bangtan Boys | BTS
Genre: Angst, Comedy, Fluff, M/M, Pls enjoy this, Sexual Humor, Smut, Texting, another 97 gc fic, bambam still loves him, i love the 97 line, i love writing this it's amazing, jaehyun the diq lover, mingyu is a dense noodle, seokmin is getting ruined, this entire thing is a shitpost, ur typical texting fic, yugyeom is an instigator
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-11-18
Updated: 2017-12-22
Packaged: 2019-02-03 18:34:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 1,577
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12753858
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/seouq
Summary: yugycum: dudeyugycum: can i add a friend or two?bambitch: sureyugycum added 5 people to the chat!bambitch: what the fuckbambitch: you only said one or two people





	1. "what the fuck, jeongguk"

**Author's Note:**

> I RECOMMEND U READ THIS ON A PHONE BC IT LOOKS DUSTY ON PC !!!!!!
> 
> i love the 97 liner gc idea so fuckin much !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i wanna know what they talk about so like ,,,,, this chat is pretty much just self indulgent tbh ,,, uhhh an internet friend(????)/social media mutual gave me the idea for the group chat name so god bless but i came up with the nicknames myself and they're unoriginal™
> 
> pls let me know what u think of this bc i want to know if i should continue it or drop it,,, it's pretty different to what i usually write but i don't care bc ??????? it's so fun to write !!!!! and how they talk in the group chat is highkey how i talk in group chats so this is literally reflecting myself to these fuqers
> 
> anyways enjoy !!! :)

  
**kunpimcock bhuwankul my bitch**

5:32pm

**yugycum:** dude  
**yugycum:** can i add a friend or two  
**bambitch:** sure?

****

**yugycum added 5 people to the chat!**

**bambitch:** gyeom what the fuck  
**bambitch:** you only said one or two people  
**jeongguk:** sup fuckers  
**jeongguk:** what is this gay shit  
**yugycum:** a chat for the 97 liner hoez  
**mingyu:** it’s like 3am what the fuck is going on  
**minghao:** who the fuck is bambitch  
**yugycum:** kunpimook bhuwakul ??  
**minghao:** did you sneeze  
**minghao:** bless you :))  
**bambitch:** you bitch  
**seokmin:** you guys !!! filthy language !!  
**jaehyun:** sup fuqs !  
**jaehyun:** says you, daddy ass lookin bich  
**jeongguk:** i’m changing ur ugli™ ass nicknames

****

**jeongguk changed mingyu’s nickname to “mingyeww”!**

  
**

jeongguk changed seokmin’s nickname to “succmin”!

**  
**

jeongguk changed minghao’s nickname to “the8-that-ass”!

**  
**

jeongguk changed jaehyun’s nickname to “jae-hung ;)”!

**

**yugycum:** what the fuck jeongguk

****

**jae-hung ;) changed jeongguk’s nickname to “climbin’ on that junglecock”!**

****

****  


**climbin’ on that junglecock:** oh sweet  
**jae-hung ;):** so i can see what kind of chat this is going to be ,,  
**the8-that-ass:** i’m horny  
**succmin:** oh golly please stop !!!  >:(((  
**mingyeww:** “oh golly”  
**mingyeww:** so sweet  
**mingyeww:** a whole daddy  
**bambitch:** gyeom u better fucking remove these crusty nuggets  
**yugycum:** no can do crackerjack  
**jae-hung ;):** “gyeom” ur actually boyfriends  
**climbin’ on that junglecock:** can i cchange the name of this chat  
**climbin’ on that junglecock:** bc y’all are fuqn rank  
**yugycum:** yeah sure :)

****

**climbin’ on that junglecock changed the group chat name to pussy no balls**

**bambitch:** why  
**climbin’ on that junglecock:** no faqs in this gc  
**yugycum:** ironic  
**yugycum:** i’m currently givin the succ  
**bambitch:** that’s a fuckin lie you can’t give head when ur chocking on my magnum dong  
**jae-hung ;):** choking*  
**bambitch:** sucq my diq  
**yugycum:** i’m right fuckn here  
**climbin’ on that junglecock:** where are the svt thots  
**the8-that-ass:** lurkin  
**mingyeww:** comforting seokmin u monsters  
**succmin:**  
**succmin:** u rude people !!!

****

**succmin left the group “pussy no balls”**

**jae-hung ;):** add daddy back !!!!  
**the8-that-ass:** ur the real daddy here  
**the8-that-ass:** the real og  
**mingyeww:** i’ll add him

****

**mingyeww added seokmin the group “pussy no balls”**

  
**

mingyeww changed seokmin’s nickname to “succmin”!

**

**succmin:** behave !!!!!  
**jae-hung ;):** okay daddy

****

**succmin left the group “pussy no balls”**

****

****  



	2. fouirk ? fouirq ? fouirckq?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> mingyeww: guys  
> mingyeww: how do u spell fork?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is. shit but it made me laugh

****

**pussy no balls**

  


11:18pm

  


**mingyeww:** uhhhhh dudes  
 **mingyeww:** how do u spell fork ??????  
 **bambitch:** i  
 **bambitch:** oh my god  
 **bambitch:** >  
 **climbin’ on that junglecock:** ur a whole dumbass and a half  
 **mingyeww:** no guys seriously u don’t understand help  
 **mingyeww:** how do u spell it  
 **jae-hung ;):** u just fuqin did spell it  
 **mingyeww:** fourq?  
 **mingyeww:** fourk  
 **mingyeww:** foorq  
 **mingyeww:** forck  
 **mingyeww:** fouirk ? fouirq ? fouirckq?  
 **the8-that-ass:** where in the fuck do u hear a q   
**mingyeww:** at the end  
 **yugycum:** foorq is right !! :)  
 **mingyeww:** thank u !!!!  <3  
 **climbin’ on that junglecock:** GYEOM WHAT THE FUCK  
 **jae-hung ;):** nah fam yugyeom’s out here doing the lords work  
 **bambitch:** i love my bf  
 **the8-that-ass:** god that’s so fucking domestic i’m gonna throw up

  


12:47am

  


**climbin’ on that junglecock:** guys seokmin still hasn’t been added back  
 **bambitch:**  
 **jae-hung ;):** who is seokmin idk her

****

**climbin’ on that junglecock added seokmin the group “pussy no balls”**

  
**

climbin’ on that junglecock changed seokmin’s nickname to “succmin”!

**

 

**climbin’ on that junglecock:** there !!  
 **yugycum:** we should go bowling  
 **yugycum:** as a squad  
 **yugycum:** whenever y’all aren’t gettin eyefucked by 12 year old girls  
 **mingyeww:** u fuckin assholes  
 **mingyeww:** u actual dickheads  
 **mingyeww:** u lied to me   
**mingyeww:** oh my god i looked so stupid in front of him  
 **mingyeww:** oh my god i’m blockinh u all  
 **climbin’ on that junglecock:** woah what  
 **climbin’ on that junglecock:** what happened  
 **yugycum:** o o p s   
**bambitch:** I’M LAUGHING SO MUHC  
 **mingyeww:** IT’S SPELT FORK YOU IGNORANT FUCMKING RATS  
 **mingyeww:** OH MY GOD  
 **mingyeww:** WONWOO WANTS TO TEACH ME TO SPELL  
 **mingyeww:** HE OFFERED TO BE MY TEACHER  
 **jae-hung ;):** u can get him to bend u over the desk then  
 **jae-hung ;):** as compensation  
 **mingyeww:** idk what condensation means  
 **the8-that-ass:** i wanna get hella smashed by wonwoo  
 **the8-that-ass:** lemme smash @ jeon wonwoo  
 **mingyeww:** fuck off  
 **mingyeww:** me first buddy  
 **mingyeww:** ur gonna have to fight me for that diq  
 **bambitch:** i’ll be ref  
 **succmin:** wonu hyung is reading ovr my shoulder

****

mingyeww left the group “pussy no balls”

****

**  
**

**the8-that-ass:**  
 **the8-that-ass:** hello wonwoo hyung how are u doin  
 **succmin:** wonwoo said gyu needs to !!! man up i think?  
 **succmin:** he mumbled  
 **succmin:** ggrrrrr  
 **the8-that-ass:** :0  
 **yugycum:** oh boy  
 **yugycum:** we got some drama  
 **bambitch:** i smell sexual tension  
 **yugycum:** it’s me  
 **yugycum:** you left me hanging  
 **climbin’ on that junglecock:** y’all   
**climbin’ on that junglecock:** go the dick to sleep

  


2:55am

  


**jae-hung ;):** did someone say dick?


	3. "is he angry wanking??"

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> succmin: i’m sick of u guys treating me like a little kid bc i’m a grown man who swears and drinks and jacks off and i feel underappreciated  
> yugycum: pics or it didn't happen

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm running out of ideas please please hit me with ideas please i'm begging y'all. this chapter is shit but enjoy it nonetheless !

****

**pussy no balls**

  


8:12pm

  


**succmin:** jeon fucking jeongguk  
**succmin:** you fucking idiot  
**jae-hung ;):** woah  
**jae-hung ;):** woah  
**jae-hung ;):** did i read that right  
**bambitch:** “fucking”  
**yugycum:** how mad is he  
**the8-that-ass:** fuckin mad guys  
**succmin:** where the fuck is jeongguk  
**climbin’ on that junglecock:** lurkin ,,  
**succmin:** you complete idiot  
**succmin:** i saw your comeback stage  
**succmin:** behind the scenes  
**succmin:** you mentioned this fucking group chat  
**yugycum:** yo i saw that  
**succmin:** y’know everyone thinks we gather for orgies and share nudes  
**succmin:** my manager pulled me out of practice to talk to me about it  
**climbin’ on that junglecock:** lmao rly? damn that’s not a bad idea  
**mingyeww:** jeongguk don’t ur making him bite his pretty nails :((  
**succmin:** i’m sick of u guys treating me like a little kid bc i’m a grown man who swears and drinks and jacks off and i feel underappreciated  
**yugycum:** pics or it didn’t happen  
**jae-hung ;):** gyeom don’t  
**succmin:** no it’s fine :))))

****

**succmin sent an image to pussy no balls!**

**climbin’ on that junglecock:** what the fUCK  
**yugycum:** i  
**yugycum:** was kidding  
**the8-that-ass:** thANK FUCK I’M NOT WITH HIM  
**bambitch:** gyu is though ????????  
**jae-hung ;):** oh my god  
**jae-hung ;):** hao u gotta intervene  
**the8-that-ass:** I DON’T WANNA WALK IN THERE  
**mingyeww:** y’all chill  
**mingyeww:** i’m with wonwoo wtf ??? seokmin said he was fine  
**mingyeww:** why? what’s happening??????????????????  
**yugycum:** scroll up  
**jae-hung ;):** no don’t  
**mingyeww:** what th  
**mingyeww:**  
**bambitch:** bro i’m crying  
**climbin’ on that junglecock:** issa coq  
**mingyeww:** wonwoo just gagged  
**the8-that-ass:** is he angry wnanking  
**the8-that-ass:** wanking*  
**yugycum:** wnanking  
**succmin:** :)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))  
**mingyeww:** wash ur hands and don’t come near me  
**mingyeww:** go bother jeonghan instead  
**succmin:** i don’t need to go bother jeonghan hyung  
**succmin:** he was with me :)

****

climbin’ on that junglecock and 5 others left the group “pussy no balls”

****

****  


**succmin:**


	4. "saddest dab i've ever seen"

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the8-that-ass: dabbing ain’t easy  
> bambitch: there’s an ART to it  
> jae-hung ;): there’s an art to executing the perfect murder too

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this suck PLEASE give me ideas plsplspslpsl THIS IS SO BAD I'M SORRY

****

**pussy no balls**

  


3:31am

  


****

**succmin added kim yugyeom and 5 others the group “pussy no balls”**

  
**

succmin changed jung yoonoh and 5 others nicknames!

**

 

  


7:04am

  


**the8-that-ass:** aite so  
**the8-that-ass:** listen up  
**the8-that-ass:** bambam and this fine ass were talkin  
**mingyeww:** what ass  
**jae-hung ;):** ur flat  
**yugycum:** flat bih  
**the8-that-ass:** do you wanna hear it or nah  
**mingyeww:** fire away smh  
**bambitch:** okay so  
**bambitch:** i’m finna eggplain  
**bambitch:** hao was talking abt how he saw kook on a live stage  
**bambitch:** and apparently he did the most pathetic dab  
**the8-that-ass:** saddest dab i’ve ever seen  
**climbin’ on that junglecock:**  
**succmin:** i saw that lmaoooo sad  
**bambitch:** yeet anyways  
**bambitch:** hao and i wanna teach y’all how to dab  
**mingyeww:** what the  
**the8-that-ass:** aite listen up y’all  
**the8-that-ass:** see this  
**the8-that-ass:**  
**the8-that-ass:** dabbing ain’t easy  
**bambitch:** there’s an ART to it  
**jae-hung ;):** there’s an art to executing the perfect murder too  
**climbin’ on that junglecock:** hao that’s not art it’s the pythagorean theory  
**climbin’ on that junglecock:** which is math  
**yugycum:** bambam why  
**yugycum:** do u still want this ass  
**bambitch:** why the fuck would i want ur ass u ugly fuicknm  
**bambitch:** only here fr ur diq  
**succmin:**  
**jae-hung ;):** that’S MY FACE UR USING

****

yugycum left the group “pussy no balls”

****

****  


**climbin’ on that junglecock:** kunpimook what the fuck  
**climbin’ on that junglecock:** that was actually so fucing rude  
**climbin’ on that junglecock:** like what the fucmk he’s ur bouyfriend  
**the8-that-ass:** yeah it was. actually too far  
**mingyeww:** i’ll call him dw i’ll take him out for a bit  
**succmin:** i’ll come  
**jae-hung ;):** yea me too  
**climbin’ on that junglecock:** be there in 10  
**bambitch:** can;t i talk to him tho  
**succmin:** nah famalam i thinq ur finna have to wait ur turn smh  
**jae-hung ;):** wait fuck can i bring doyoung and taeyong bc we were on a date but i can’t leave them\  
**the8-that-ass:** the more the merrier  
**mingyeww:** expect for bambitch  
**mingyeww:** the snake  
**bambitch:**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> your comments and kudos are appreciated and welcomed !! any constructive criticism is also welcome (even though this is a thicc ass shitpost) !!!


	5. "go to sleep ya fag"

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> yugycum: that’s expensive ?  
> jae-hung ;): i don’t care  
> jae-hung ;): y’all deserve it  
> bambitch: fuck that’s gay

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is kinda sad, but i'm losing inspiration :((((((((((((

****

**pussy no balls**

  


4:21pm

  


****

**bambitch added kim yugyeom to the group “pussy no balls”**

**bambitch:** guys  
**bambitch:** have you heard  
**climbin’ on that junglecock:** yeah, i don’t wanna talk about it  
**yugycum:** what happened?  
**yugycum:** oh wait  
**yugycum:** yeah  
**succmin:** i’m not sure about hao and gyu, but i won’t be vry active on here for a few days?  
**succmin:** soonyoung isn’t doing very good  
**succmin:** and we still have a clap stages tomorrow  
**mingyeww:** and a fansign  
**jae-hung ;):** yo guys  
**jae-hung ;):** won’t be active much  
**jae-hung ;):** suppose ur going to the service?  
**climbin’ on that junglecock:** yeah  
**the8-that-ass:** the 13 of us were gonna go after the press were gone  
**yugycum:** smart

  


1:07am

  


**jae-hung ;):** we should all go out to dinner sometime?  
**jae-hung ;):** whenever your schedules are next clear  
**succmin:** ours are clear in a couple days  
**climbin’ on that junglecock:** should we go out in january sometime?  
**jae-hung ;):** sounds good  
**jae-hung ;):** i’ll shout youse  
**yugycum:** there are 7 of us  
**yugycum:** that’s expensive ?  
**jae-hung ;):** i don’t care  
**jae-hung ;):** y’all deserve it  
**bambitch:** fuck that’s gay  
**bambitch:** go to sleep ya fag  
**jae-hung ;):** mm goodnight

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> next chapter will probably be a timeskip ?????? and a proper chapter ??? no texting ?????? wow what a glow up

**Author's Note:**

> i don't know where i'm gonna take this lmao
> 
> let me know what u think u crusty hoez ily <33333


End file.
